The Underlying Power of Emotional Support

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” — Leo Buscaglia

Being strong, self-reliant and fighters does not make us indestructible or invincible. Being vulnerable only means that we are human. After all, our foundation is based on emotions and we all have our strengths and our weaknesses.

I spent my entire life believing that inner strength entails struggling and facing calamities alone. It made me feel that I am independent and a brave warrior. Reality is I was slowly destroying myself. Facing the obstacles of life by ourselves is draining and a very unpleasant experience.

I love people and appreciate spending time with them, but I tend to be a loner most of the time. I forever assumed that keeping a distance was less of a headache and more rewarding for my mental wellbeing. As an overly sensitive person, I was avoiding emotional pain.

I believed that sharing my problems with others, particularly with my loved ones, would burden and pressure them. The last thing I ever wanted was to be a load on anyone. My ego would not accept this feeling. So, I mistakenly decided that I was better off on my own.

For as long as I can remember, I fought my battles quietly. At times, it was obvious to the people around me that something wrong was going on in my life. Even though I said nothing, it was written all over my face. Yet, whenever I attempted to share my worries with them, I felt a heavy weight on my chest. I thought that my despair would make me lame. This is a feeling I despise.

I have no idea how I managed to cope by myself all this time. I realize now that concealing my feelings from the people who care about me, stressed and angered them after they found out, more than the tension I thought they would feel if I opened up to them.

I am a worrisome and a fearful person. I still worry and I am still scared. But I am work in progress. I obviously cannot change overnight even though I am aware that I should take a different approach if I truly care about my happiness and want to lead a healthy life.

Also, by nature, I give unconditional support to everyone around me, and I go out of my way to help others. I have always managed to be a great mentor yet failed to be one to the most important person in my life… Me.

The reason I am sharing my story is because recently I went through an unexpected health scare. I struggled and as usual, I chose to face the issue alone. I failed miserably in the beginning. Coincidently, my cousin, who is my lifetime friend and who I care about deeply and trust, was visiting. She noticed that something unusual was going on. She could sense my pain and the effort I was putting to pretend everything was normal. She insisted that I tell her, and I did. To my surprise, she was not at all burdened with my concerns nor scared nor worried. Instead, she was positive. All what she said made sense to me. Her daily support and kindness helped me go through my dilemma. While I listened to her I was lost, skeptical, frustrated, and anxious, yet optimistic. She would not leave my side until she noticed a positive change within me. Amazingly, I gradually started controlling my thoughts and visualizing the day I would get the good news and learn that all my fears were an illusion. Visualization eased my life and made me feel hopeful.

I later decided to share my worries with a couple of close friends dismissing the idea that I would be judged and the feeling of shame. That turned out to be a wonderful experience.

I was surrounded by a group of caring people, who did nothing but lift my spirits.

My experience was not easy. I had many sleepless nights. I dreaded waking up in the morning. Whilst I am a person of faith and deep inside, I knew that opening my eyes every morning was a gift and a blessing, I still woke up overwhelmed with stress and anxiety. I put all my work and life plans on hold. It felt like my world stopped spinning.

If you are wondering, I finally got the good news! I am relieved. I cannot be more grateful, and thankful for the support I received.

My recent suffering taught me that WE CANNOT LIVE ON THIS PLANET ALONE. Our encounters are meant to be shared with the people who honestly care for us. Hardships are the best times for us to identify who really care and who do not. Adversities reveal the true colors of the people surrounding us. We all need to support, love, and care for each other and sail through the journey of life with each other peacefully. Every issue will be resolved, and no troubles last forever.

I believe that profound faith, close family, and genuine friends are the real treasures in our lives. They are our strength, and the means to keep us going. No matter what you go through, try to keep your hopes high and trust the Divine. Value your family and friends. Accept their help and give back. Every obstacle becomes easier to deal with.

Do not underestimate the power of emotional support. Reaching out for help can relieve us and bring us peace. Know that you cannot handle everything by yourself. Seeking help is not shameful. Compassion, concern, and empathy are the elements of life.

Finally, my advice to you if you go through difficult times, is to try the below approaches:

1. Share your concerns

Be prepared to talk about your issue. Make connections with the right people. Talk to those who you love, and you know care for you. You will be surprised with what they have to offer you. Know that true friends and close family accept you and care for your unconditionally.

2. Be on the move

Go out. Spend time with people or get in touch with nature. These are your blessings. Enjoy them and feel gratitude.

3. Journal your feelings

Write down your thoughts about the situation and your feelings. Once you release them, you will feel relieved.

4. Surround yourself with positive energy

Positivity will cheer you up and help you overcome your fears.

5. Do not be afraid to ask

Do not decide on behalf of others what they will feel if you ask for help. You owe it to yourself to look for comfort and advice outside yourself and to believe that you will receive the emotions and the care you are looking for.

6. Accept the help offered to you

Voicing your issue and accepting help does not make you weak. It will aid you to go through your difficult times and will give you solace.

7. Meditate

Despite my worries and frustration, I still found it in me to meditate for 15 minutes in the morning and another 15 minutes before bedtime. Meditation calms your body and quiets your subconscious mind.

8. Seek professional help

If you feel that the above advices are not working for you, seek professional help. You will surely be guided on how to handle your situation and overcome the stress taking over your life.

“It’s up to you today to start making healthy choices. Not choices that are just healthy for your body, but healthy for your mind.” — Steve Maraboli

Always look after your emotional wellbeing. This does not mean that you will not experience difficult times or that you will always be filled with positive feelings. Whether we like it or not, challenges do form a part of life which we all experience from time to time. I just ask you to seek the right coping mechanism to overcome any hardships which you may be going through. Life is too short. Enrich it with the right mindset, try not to think of what you cannot control, and stay hopeful.